if i am quick about it, i may be able to scribble a few words. not that i really know what to say. but it’s been so long; there must be something.
therapy has been eventful lately. olivia came out yesterday… we’ve been talking a lot about system politics. for some reason, in some way, i feel closer to reaching the ones of power than every before. as equals. as guarded trucemakers, as one intelligent being to another. unrealistic, maybe. i don’t know. but there’s whispered conversations with someone, who says don’t we want them that way? jareth-style. there must be some give somewhere. a way to work together, a way for sarah to keep her power without snatching it from the goblin king, who fulfilled everything she ever wanted from him.
i don’t know. anonymous, of course. i don’t even know if it’s a real one of power or someone in the periphery. officially, they rarely even meet with me, and it must be a face-to-face meeting, and they must stand firm in their party line.
Continue reading ‘just cause you think you’ve already lost’
supposedly we need the full system’s cooperation or at least, the full system’s awareness of the proceedings. we need to be able to increase or decrease the rate at which junk flows through our head. brakes, accelerator, faucet, videotape, whatever. i know that the two powerful groups inside don’t necessarily agree. that miss shirley would never expose us to a memory, whereas the ones of power might, if they felt we needed an appropriate punishment. her camp is fueled mainly by loyalty to the mother, the day mother, and what she might want; the ones of power are fueled mainly by loyalty to the ones in charge of everything. so, naturally, they have more power in the system.
Continue reading ‘just before the deal got real sweet’
Written on March 8, 2006 by claire.
i can’t believe it. i’ve actually finished my mountain of work, and work, and work. all i have left to do is be in class and take tests. there is no more homework for the entire quarter. i mean, granted, there’s only two more days of classes, but that’s still pretty cool. i took my japanese oral exam an hour ago, and it is very nice to have that over with. i plan to skip spanish tomorrow because we are just watching a movie, and sure i’ll lose participation points but it’s so stupid. even with my glasses i can’t read the english subtitles and it is just not interesting anyway. with spanish on the tv, i seem to be able to get almost all the little pieces, but i have to concentrate so hard on getting them that i miss the big picture.
i don’t have japanese tomorrow, so if i skip spanish i get to cut my day down to a quarter the size. and that is very helpful, especially on a thursday when there is so much else going on.
Continue reading ‘the good, the bad, the ugly’
